A Christmas "Ant" Carol

[Wood~Ant]

Firstly my apologies to Charles Dickens, as this story is loosely based on his famous novel.

A Christmas Ant Carol

'Twas the night before Christmas, and inside the red ant nest everyone was very excited and ready to make merry, as the queens were throwing a big party. The honeydew mead wine was getting low, so a worker ant was asked to go to the wine cellars in the lowest chambers to get some more.
It was here that Zed the honeydew keeper lived. "May I have more honeydew for the Christmas party the queens are giving please? How much can you spare me?" asked the worker.
Zed gnashed his jaws together and replied, "Christmas, who needs it. Bah Stinkbugs. You can tell that lot in the upper nest that I have none to give."
The worker left looking very glum, as she knew Zed was an old miser who had lots of honeydew in his cellar, and without it the party would soon be spoilt as they would have no drink to wash down the food with.

Down below Zed was about to go to bed, as he never kept the Christmas spirit and wanted nothing to do with it. He never hung a stocking or pillow case at the end of his bed, and now he was an old ant he wasn't about to change. No other ants would work for him, but Bob Cricket helped, although he was treated with contempt. "May I have tomorrow off sir, as it is Christmas Day and it's only once a year sir?" Bob asked.
Zed had granted this request though it meant paying the lazy cricket for having a whole day off work.
He was just about to get into bed when he heard an eerie moaning. "Must be something I ate" he thought aloud, when suddenly his long dead brother Jed appeared before him. "What do you want?" Zed said. Jed tried to speak but nothing came out, so he wrote it the dust of the cellar, You will be visited by 3 ghosts, listen to their warnings as they are the ghosts of Christmas Past, Christmas Present and Christmas Future. Then Jed vanished giving a loud moan and wail as he left.

"What a load of poppycock. Ghosts indeed, I shan't listen to them as I don't believe in them" Zed mused.
"They can all bug off as far as I am concerned, and that's what I think of Christmas too!"
Not long after a pale whitish ghost ant came into Zed's chamber. "I am the ghost of Christmas Past" it told him.

[Wood~Ant]

Bob Cricket had a lot of children, and needed the meagre income he got from old Zed. Bob's youngest was a son called Titchy Tom, who was a sickly kid with only 5 legs instead of 6; and Bob wanted the best life he could give to his children, as any loving father would.

Meanwhile the Ghost Ant of Christmas Past said to Zed, "I will show you your past life when you were a happy little larvae and a contented young pupa, before you became a crotchity old miserly nasty old ant."
"Bah Stinkbugs" Zed replied, "I like to keep my honeydew stocks just for me, as I am the richest ant in the entire nest. Yes, even richer than the queens" he smirked.
The Ghost Ant showed Zed the good times it had enjoyed when he was but an egg. How the ants celebrated the joy of life and Christmas meant having a good time with your family and friends; but old Zed just kept on saying "Bah Stinkbugs" and "Christmas, who needs it? I hate the cold and my joints hurt, so why should I enjoy this silly festival."
In the end the Ghost Ant gave up trying and told Zed, "Maybe the next spirit can do better with you, as I can't, so I wash my feelers of you, you old misery guts."
"Good riddance" Zeg shouted as the Ghost vanished.

It seemed only a minute had past when Zed saw a glowing light outside his chamber. "Who's let the glow-worms out again?" he ranted. Then a deep booming voice came from the chamber entrance.
"Come in Zed and know me better" it said.

Zed went to the entrance and found a huge chamber stacked high with all sorts of good food and drink. Sat at the end of which was a large Wood Ant dressed in a robe of pine needles and holly berries, wearing a crown of mistletoe on its head. The Wood Ant waved to Zed and said, "I am the ghost of Christmas Present, come in and know me better mate. Now let me show you what you're missing."
And with that the ghost wrapped her robe around Zed and lifted him up. Before long they were inside every ant nest for miles around, and in each one a party was in full swing, with games, singing and lots to eat and drink.
Zed looked on as glum as he always was, and when they got to Bob Cricket's home Zed told the spirit "Why should it bother me if Bob has a son with only 5 legs. better if Titchy Tom had died or never been born then if he is going to be a burden on the world. Only the strong survive, or the very rich" he gloated with a vile grin.
"My time is nearly gone" said the spirit, "But surely you can see that Christmas brings joy to the world and a lot of insects enjoy this festive period?"
"CHRISTMAS, Bah Stinkbugs I say about it all" was the only reply Zed made.
"Spirit what is that under your robe?" Zed asked as he saw something poking out.
The ghost lifted her robe to reveal 2 young human children.
"The boy is happiness, as he collects and studies ants and other insects." The boy looked up and griined at Zed with a huge beaming smile.
"The girl is fear, as insects make her cry and she doesn't like them at all." As the girl saw Zed and screamed at him.

"Oh, well in that case, be gone and take them away from me as fast as you can" Zed replied; and with that the ghost vanished.

[Wood~Ant]

A moment elapsed, and suddenly a dark shadow floated across Zed's bed. He looked up and asked, "Are you the last spirit, the Ghost of Christmas yet to come?"
The ghost nodded and pointed toward the darkest part of the chamber. "What do you want me to do?" asked Zed, but the spirit said nothing as it floated out through the chamber wall.
Curious, Zed followed and found himself passing through the soil wall and found he was again at Bob Cricket's home. This time there was nothing but sadness, as Bob's children wept and wailed; and Bob's wife cried bitterly saying, "My poor Titchy Tom is all dead and gone."
Bob said, "If only that Scrooge Zed had paid me more, none of this would've happened. Curse him and his rotten honeydew stocks."

"Well" said Zed, "If that's his attitude he can find employment elsewhere, as I will fire him first thing tomorrow. Then let's see if he can keep a big family going on no wages at all."
Zed could now see that the last ghost was a huge black ant, which moved like the smoke from a forest fire and smelled just as bad.
The ghost waved its antennae at him as it pointed the way he had to go, so Zed followed as he was intrigued to know more.
A dead ant was being carried out from the nest. "Who is that ant? Do I know them? Zed enquired; but as before that dark spirit said nothing, it just floated toward the scene with Zed close behind.
"I'm happy he's dead, now we can drink more honeydew" said one worker ant. "Me too" said another, "He always was a miserable old scroat. I wonder who will get his nice large bed chamber?"

"Who are they talking about spirit?" asked Zed, and with that the body was revealed as it was dumped unceremoniously onto the nest midden. It was the dead body of Zed, all manky and tarnished.
"Oh, it's me. Well I suppose I had to die sometime and you can't win 'em all." he laughed out loud.
"I wonder when this is going to happen?"

The dark spirit of Christmas Future had had enough, and it turned on Zed and killed him there and then.
Bob Cricket got the honeydew stock business and became rich, but shared his wealth with the whole colony and helped other, less fortunate ants and insects whenever he could.
Titchy Tom was gived a new leg made from a dried grass stalk and the ants helped him learn to walk again; and as for Zed, his body was removed far away from the rest of the nest by royal decree from the queens, as not one ant had any kindness or pity for this old miser who had been such a pain in the butt.
Zed had brought his fate upon himself by not learning any lessons from his mistakes, and had paid the price in the long run.

THE END

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The moral of this story is, enjoy life to the full and be nice to others along the way, as you never know how long you will be around to enjoy it and how many Christmas's you have left; and unlike Ebenezer Scrooge in the Charles Dickens novel, not everyone changes for the better, so be careful that the Dark Side doesn't take you.

[Black Ant]

Rather a clever twist on an old favourite of mine replacing Scrooge with an ant. Oh, "Twist" as in Oliver is another Dickens book/film too, so it goes well as a comment here I guess